Weddings and marriage:
The best advice I can give you is PLAN, PLAN, PLAN, and then forget it and enjoy yourselves! Once the big event is here, let it all go and relax, because it is YOUR SPECIAL DAY! If everything does not happen exactly as you expected, realize it can still be a PERFECT event…
Here is an article from someone who knows this from first hand experience… I was the PERFECT planner. I had organized every last detail (that I knew of) and I had imagined that day moment by moment. After pouring over every wedding planner I could find, reading every suggestion I could encounter, and printing off enough articles about weddings to fill a book, my day arrived. I knew it would be PERFECT, because of the hours and hours of preparation and attention to detail we had given this day. I was right- it was everything I ever wanted.
My wedding was wonderful, a dream come true. It was perfect! Yes, I said perfect, but perfect BECAUSE of the flaws. You see, the little flaws added character and are still laughed at now as we look back on that beautiful day.
We chose a formal ceremony at a church special to us, with a large crowd. We will always remember that despite the stormy night, over 200 guests still attended. A tornado even touched down about 30 miles north of us that night! Luckily none of us heard the warning sirens go off during the ceremony, or that would have really been a story (someone was listening to the storm spotters and made sure that no tornados were really headed our way, so we were safe). I am also glad no one told me about this until later. But now, I laugh at it (and feel blessed to have had so many friends and family that cared so much and came anyway). It was a perfect night.
During the ceremony we had communion to celebrate our devotion to each other before God. We take communion seriously, but I remember we almost laughed because after we “took the bread” and ate it, it was time to “take the cup”, and it was EMPTY! The pastor said “just fake it!” We still look back and laugh at pretending to drink together while trying to still look reverent (after all, the guests had no idea what was funny). We realize God still accepted our ceremony without a real drink, and our communion prayer was special, but we still immediately recall laughing under our breath while trying to look serious- what fun! After all the planning to make every part of the ceremony PERFECT, something unexpected and imperfect still happened- and it was a PERFECT ceremony. I would not change any part of it.
At the reception, everything went beautifully- it was perfect. I watch the video and feel as if it were just yesterday. I remember specifically the toast before the cake cutting. We were all set for the traditional photo with our arms wrapped around each other as we drank from our special glasses (ordered by catalog), when we realized I had the wrong punch. Since I do not eat or drink sugar I was going to have sparkling cider, but there was none. Our photographer yelled out “who has her special punch?” which made for a funny laugh from guests (hard liquor or what?). Finally our caterer found some orange juice in the church kitchen and poured it for me, and everyone smiled as we took the photo and toasted to our new lives together. I smiled as I cringed. I almost spit it out all over me- my husband thought my facial expression was priceless. I have never had fermented orange juice as gross as that! IT WAS HILARIOUS! What a PERFECT evening.
Are you seeing a theme here? You can plan every detail and try to make everything PERFECT, but remember, some of the imperfections to your perfect day will add character and extra fond memories for years to come. So plan, dream, and then relax and have fun on that special day, perfect in all its flaws. I would not trade those memories for ANYTHING!
